Monday, May 20, 2013

Ain't nobody got time for that

As promised I am getting back into the blog of things.  My first post is about dieting.  I know, blah, but I promised.

Okay.  I have to start off by mentioning that I absolutely suck at sticking to anything that has to do with bettering myself.  I'm busy.  Super busy.  I'm lucky if I get to change my shirt on a daily basis or *gasp* soak in a bath tub.  So naturally any diet I've tried has failed.  I'm actually okay with myself.  As long as I'm alive and breathing I'm doing good.  Right?  Anywho I've managed to find something that finally works.  Here it goes...

Mindset.  I hear about 24 day challenges and "I wanna weigh this much by this month or else I am stoopit".  No ma'am.  I don't have the luxury of planning anything two days from now.  So I've come up with a new mindset for myself and it also was the birth of my own diet plan.

The One Day Challenge.  

I'm sure you are saying "wtf" but hear me out.  I've decided to take my diet plan, much like my life, one day at a time.  If I get through that day then BAM I'm a winner!  In my head I'm amazeballs.  Woo hoo go me.  

Here's what I do.  Taking that mindset of surviving and winning one day at a time I make small changes to start.  I don't have a lot of money so I can't go out and buy all kinds of healthy awesomeness.  I don't have the time to prepare super healthy meals.  My diet plan is realistic for me.  There are many days I look at the clock and it's 4:30 pm and I'm like "crap" where did the time go?  I throw in some frozen pizzas because I have an army of people who need food and NOW.  Naturally it's easy to grab 2 or 3 slices of pizza and chow down then get on with my evening.  My new plan is to grab one slice, blot it with a napkin(did you know that cuts 20-50 calories a slice?!), then grab some applesauce or some yogurt. Shazam I've cut calories, haven't over eaten on something bad for me, and I didn't deprive myself of something delish.

I'm a huge fan of green sauce.  It's my go to snack, okay who am I kidding I can make a meal out of that ish.  I usually put a bunch in a bowl and grab the bag of chips and go to town.  Now I grab the whole bowl and put 10-20 chips on a plate.  Once the chips are gone I'm done.  No more.  Walk away, Coco, walk away.  Mindset.  If I have a whole bag of chips my brain says "you've still got a lotta chips sister.  Keep going.  You can dooo eeeeet".  Now when the chips are gone from my plate my brain automatically thinks "DONE".  

So basically the diet plan is make small changes, don't deprive yourself, change your plating to fool your brain, and take the one day challenge to heart.  If you end up screwing up one day move on and focus on the next day.  There are 365 days in a year.  Even if you have 1-2 screw ups a week you are still winning in a major way.

Do not set unrealistic goals.  In a perfect world we could wave our magic wands and cure our issues with skittles and kitten breath.  In my world, feeling like a winner one day at a time actually fuels me to keep going!  
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Thursday, May 31, 2012

End of a Chapter

I haven't posted in a little while, we've been so busy with end of school year activities.  It's been a whirlwind.  Today was the last day for Brenna at her school.  Next year she will be attending a new school in a completely different district.  I've dealt with district changes and teacher changes and school changes but this time it's a little harder.  Who am I kidding, it's a lot harder.  She has had her teachers for two years in a row in her PPCD class.  Next year she will be going into Life Skills.  It's a whole different ballgame.  I've teared up all week but today I couldn't see to drive home.  I cried on the way there, in the classroom, out in the hallway, in the parking lot, on the way home, in my mother in law's office, back to the house.  I have removed my contacts and put my eye glasses on.  So, now that we have established that I'm a big blubbering baby I'll move on to why.  These teachers, are nothing short of amazing.  I've dealt with many teachers in my life with my other three so I have many to compare them to.  The connection she has, the connection I have, the love and the compassion they have are insurmountable.  I owe them all of my gratitude.  I hope they know how much I appreciate them.  

Now, I am scared.  I'm scared of the new school and Brenna's future.  I'm scared of new people who have no clue as to how she "operates".  The new school has ginormous shoes to fill and you can bet I'm going to be my daughter's champion and hero to make sure it happens.  I have two months to prepare for this and to prepare for MY new chapter.  A mother of four kids in school full time.

I foresee a higher occurrence of blog posts come end of August.

Janie, Val, Kristi, and Pennie.  Thank you for treating my daughter with respect, love, compassion, and like she was your own.  In her eyes, even though she can't verbalize it, you are her heroes.
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Saturday, May 12, 2012

Just DANCE!!!


Kaylee and I
Today was Kaylee's recital.  Seeing her on stage with that huge smile on her face was worth the extreme amount of money, stress, arguments, and finagling of schedules to make dance class every week except one this past year.  This was her first year and we couldn't have asked for a better experience.  She needs something just for her.  It's sometimes, well, who am I kidding...It's ALL THE TIME hard on my other three kiddos to be a sibling to an Autistic child.  They need their 
outlets, their quiet time, their one on one with mom and dad.  They need a break too.  So today we celebrated Kaylee in all of her dancing glory.  She had her best friend in her class this year too.  How lucky she is!  They did such a wonderful job and I'm extremely proud of her and Hailey aka the Ayley's.
                                                  

Hailey H (her bestie), Hailey C, and Kaylee
I'm also proud of Brenna who sat through half of the recital.  She made a lot of noise and was pretty disruptive BUT she didn't have a meltdown.  It was the first time we publicly subjected her to a confined indoor area with a bunch of people in a dark setting.  Maybe next year she can sit through the whole thing!

Kaylee Danielle, I love you and I am proud of you.  I cannot wait until next year to see you evolve more as a dancer.  




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Not Born With It

A video of our sweet Brenna.

Brenna, not born with it.
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Tuesday, May 1, 2012

Awareness Overload

Autism awareness month is over.  I'm kind of relieved, to be honest.  Now we go into Lupus Awareness month.  Okay...next!  I don't really care about my lupus which is probably going to bite me in the butt later but I'm sorry, I don't have time.  We also have children's mental health awareness day on May 9.  You still following me?  I have a proposal.  Let's all be more aware of everyone around us and be less judgmental, more helpful, understanding, and compassionate 365 days out of the year.  Do we really need days to be reminded to be better people towards those with serious life issues and hurdles?  With 6 people in my family, we hit a lot of the awareness days and months for different things.  Being "aware" is no longer the issue.  Being proactive in finding help, cures, and assistance for things is the problem.  I think awareness is great but thus far, raising it(awareness) hasn't really helped a whole lot of people.  Or maybe it has.  I don't know.  Maybe I'm just burned out on standing on the soapbox to get someone to hear me.  Maybe I want action instead of words and sympathy.  Or maybe I just need to use the awareness days as a reminder to teach my family, especially my kids, that they need to be more compassionate and understanding and all of that jazz.  Yeah, let's go with that.

Be aware!!!!

Months-January

February


March

April

May

June

July

August

September

October

November

December

Weeks-

 

Days- January

February

March

April

May

June

July

August

September

October

November

December

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Thursday, April 26, 2012

Introducing...

My daughter Brenna is 5.  She is nonverbal and has classic Autism.  The only person in my life that has conquered my stubbornness and patience issues.  She's forever changed me, for the better!
My daughter, Kaylee, is a 7 year old going on 30.  Independent, spirited, and displays signs of opposition defiant disorder aka stubborn.  :)  One day she will be a lawyer.  Trust me.  It's her calling.
My son Dylan is 11 and is a genius waiting for the right moment in time to be a part of something big or make something big happen.  He is extremely bright.
My son Austin is a sensitive 13 year old who battles bi-polar disorder and adhd and does everything in his power to fit in and not get bullied.
My husband is a hard working man who is my go to source for venting my frustrations.  He is an amazing father and my soft place to fall on when the day is too much for me.
I am a stay at home mom in my 30's trying to make sense of the world and of our life.  My goal is to take the pieces of us and arrange them to where they make sense.  I am strong, weak, honest, scared, hopeful, and I can be a royal pain in the butt.  

Together we are a tight knit and strong family.  Like a well oiled machine we are there for one another 100 percent.  We also break down and need each other to help with repairs.  Each of us represents something different and we fit together like a puzzle.  Apart we are nothing.  Put together we are something beautiful and at times tragic.  It's a sight to behold!!
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Thursday

Thursday.  The one day out of the week that my other daughter, Kaylee, wants my full and undivided attention for just one hour for dance.  Of course she asks for more than that one hour a week but sadly she knows the answer.  My son, Austin, has tennis.  My other son, Dylan, has nothing going on right now(bless him)but because Austin has tennis he and my husband don't get home until after I have left for dance.  So what's the problem?  I have to take Brenna with me and because it's too loud and crowded and not part of her normal routine I have to sit with her in the van...while she screams...for an hour.  Kaylee doesn't get to see her momma wave proudly as she walks from one studio to the other when they switch like all of the other girls do.  I'm not in there to watch her through the blinds.  I'm not there to pop in right when the class is ending to see what they have learned for the day.  Now, Kaylee is my little independent child who rarely needs anyone's help or approval.  As much as this causes friction between us it is also a blessing when it comes to certain things.  She is not clingy and can very much take care of herself in a basic capacity at the tender age of 7 if need be.  I know deep down though that this bothers her.  

It bothers me as well.

I can't give her one hour.  This is not okay.  She deserves an hour a week for it to be all about her.  Something has got to give.
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