Autism Awareness

This month, April, is autism awareness month.  I try every year to get excited about getting the word out.  I want everyone to know all about it.  The good, the bad, the struggles, the triumphs.  Well...what good is that doing us?  I mean, c'mon, why does everyone need to be aware of just how hard and difficult this journey is?  Strangers don't care.  They have their own problems.  Maybe I should turn my focus onto more important things.  Nope, there is nothing more important in my life right now.  So I'm left sitting here with no direction.  I don't even have my family on board.  My husband and our other three kids get it.  No one else does.  What I seem to get is pity.  I don't want pity, I want action.  I want help and understanding.  I want her quality of life to be better because she is surrounded by a family who will do anything for her.

We don't have that.  

We face this alone.  

I can't blame anyone for that.  We live in a world where everyone is focused on themselves and their own personal problems/agendas.  They don't live it so how can they be anything more than compassionate?  Maybe I should be focusing my efforts on ME.  Learning new ways and techniques to making her life better.  Our lives better.   Potty training would be wonderful.  Verbalizing would be a miracle.  Tackling meltdowns with a more positive attitude, less frustration, these are all things I can be doing on my own with no ones help.  But at the end of the day I'm just a lump.  A lifeless lump with no direction.  There is no manual or how to book for autism.  I will have to just weave my way through this journey with the best intentions and hope I can crack the code.